First impression is the best impression. However certain behaviors destroys the same. This blog tells you about what breaks that.
"Ehhh!!! Why is this person so shabbily dressed!", "There's no confidence with this person at all!", "Really? This thing coming from you?"
We make so many such statements when we see a person for the first time. Either we are judgemental or have already framed opinions about them. But the statement of "Don't judge a book by its cover" is contradictory to the very belief of "First impression is the best impression!"
Cynthia Ozick says "Two things remain irretrievable: time and a first impression." While a few make it, a few take a bit longer to bring in their best!
It is the normal human tendency to start framing opinions about a person they see. Most commonly it is regarding their appearance, apparels, attitude. No doubt these hit the bull's eye of making the perfect first impression, as per our understanding, these are a couple of elements that make you think twice when a first impression Impressed you.
1.Body language - from dance to public speaking, body language is a major portion of these art forms. Does that mean we restrict the same to only those two? You are being assessed from the every minute you wake up to the time you sleep, because your body speaks volumes (of course you and your mind definitely speaks more!)
In the professional performance, handshake determines your confidence. You might have the swag walk, the dashing hairstyle or the panache attire, but a poor handshake? Nopes. Not at all accepted! A firm, thorough handshake following the 2 second rule (which is approximately one or two shakes) is the ideal one. Avoid shaking for too long, or giving a meeky handshake.
Sometimes a lousy walk as well takes a toll on the rapport you've built up! Chest up with an upright back shows confidence. Yes, there might be bad days. But the trick is to feel confident. For that you have to appear confident!
Talking about that, sometimes out of anxiety we tend to tap our feet, or fiddle around with our fingers! That's not a good sign! Hope that meditation and self-motivated talks would help you calm and control your anxiety!
2. Interjecting ones personal space- in the trending zone of Right to privacy, everyone has drawn up boundary lines that they prefer to keep it for themselves. It's even addressed that a couple is going to survive much stronger when they respect each other's private space.
So what is this? Me time? My space? It is really appreciative that the growing up generations are able to identify the boundary between professional like and personal life. The time we give to ourselves, the time that we just be ourselves is the me time, and that realm of self is my space. One would love to do anything then! Mostly sleep, but also plan out for the future, laze around, or get back to doing what you love doing!
So, invading this may cause disturbance. At the same time, one's text messages, personal messages, what they surf on their phone, whom they message, they all fall within the boundaries of personal space. Snooping over that is basically interjecting one's personal space. At the same time, some have the habit of poking their nose into every element of your life. That also destroys the so called good impression that's built.
3. Question - as children we would ask a lot of questions! But somehow growing up the questioning ability just faded. It's these basic questions that brings us to understanding ourselves better. Not just ourselves, but understanding a concept better, and very much helpful in knowing the other person much better.
But having good questions or right questions and first impressions? You just asked to get to each other better??!! But that's the truth! No matter how awesome your character is, your dressing style and body language is, if you don't ask relevant questions, and those within the tangent, you might lose an opportunity.
Unlike the traditional first impression techniques, this one is recently added. And it is so relevant! Everyone is in seek of answers. But who's going to ask the right question? Or would you just sit back thinking the question isn't relevant? Well that is also a point to ponder upon, because if you don't ask relevant or quality questions, opinion about you has already changed.
4. Trying too hard- each have their own strengths and abilities. Each is special and unique in their own style. Shoes of each individual is different from the other! But the moment one tries fitting into the other, the original essence is lost. Doing so actually gives in a lot of stress to fit in, when that shoe clearly doesn't fit one.
A few try real hard to do so. But end up losing out on their best, and the best impression they have built so far. For example, one who is known for serious presentations, which is very informative and brainstorming, tries the shoe of humour and ends up messing that, then definitely makes the listener's doubt their first opinion about you.
5. Appearance- hands down on this! Just like how a book is judges by the cover, the title, so is a person with poor appearance and apparels. We get it, not everyone will be aware as to what fits them!
You need not wear a suit n be like that for every occasion. Of course when you hold the repute of a royal class one, you got no choice but be dressed always! Otherwise also, it's okay to be lazy n wear loose clothing. But when it comes to professional presentation, dressing up well is a must. (Else we might end up losing our first impressions about you :p)
Dressing up for the occasion, dressing up with all cleanliness keeps your appearance attracted and keeps your aura glowing. Well even though it's the IDC (I don't care) trend, not dressing up good attracts a lot of negative attention. That is something you have to change to lead with positivity!
How do you address this?
Well what's done is done. Here goes a saying that it's not the first impression that matters, it's who makes a lasting impression that matters. So even if the first impression went for a toss, you still got another chance to perform better!!! How?
Smile… it's a warm gesture. Keep it genuine, simple, not the creepy style. It is the first mark that breaks the ice, and gives a welcome feeling to the other person.
Talk your mind… just because one might be judgemental, doesn't mean you get to hide what you think or feel is right. Where you know you have to pitch in, please do!